How are you SPECIAL?

Is it only me or do you also feel other people are often more ‘SPECIAL’ than I am?

Be that special more accomplished (in whatever field they may be), better looking (whatever that may mean, especially when one remembers that beauty is in the eye of the beholder), better recognized (by whoever I expect or want to be recognized by, even if only in my own mind) or better able and more suited to deliver a specific message?

In my specific case I tend to look at motivational speakers and wonder WHY would anyone listen to me above anyone else, especially one of the established motivational speakers. Why would anyone want to listen to Arnold N. Pollak instead of Og mandino or Zig Ziggler or Wayne Dyer or Dennis Waitley or any other living motivational speaker including Anthony Robbins or Gilan Gork or Nick Vujicic or Suze Orman, to name but a few of the very many recognized speakers and motivators.

You see, when I look at or listen to ANY – and I mean EVERY SINGLE ONE – of the recognized motivational speakers, I see (and it is me and my perception, which may or MAY NOT be shared) that each of these people is EXCEPTIONAL in one way or another, and thus, even though many of them talk about how ‘average’ they are – or at least were – before they managed to reach the critical mass that being recognized lead to their ‘perceived’ success (we can come back to his later), I find it EXTREMELY difficult to see myself as the SAME as them. How could I possibly be the same as someone who is evidently SUCCESSFUL?!

This is not to say I am not SUCCESSFUL (once again, we can come back to this word), but why would anyone want to listen to anyone who is not EXCEPTIONAL? And this, in my moments of courage and / or stupidity, I realize that people relate to what they know, as much, if not more, than they relate to SUPERSTAR, SUPERHERO success stories.

I do believe that my purpose in this life is to TEACH (OK, so I have something to contribute), and I am aware that MANY people are not sure what t heir PURPOSE in this life is, and so some of them hat so know their purpose, they are too afraid to share it.

Lets go back to closer to ‘the beginning’ – or at least my ‘first’ life.

I was born a white South African during Apartheid. I had what I would consider a fortunate, but not ‘privileged’ childhood as I grew up in a home with loving parents in a multi cultural society. I grew up among many different cultures and faiths, although I was mostly exposed to white people. I completed school and went to university which was, in many ways, an extension of school, except with more political protests and displays, a larger number of people of color and some sort of goal. I was an average student – I lived by the motto that if 50% is a pass, then 51% is a good target. I was never going to be the top student, so why fight for it – there were definitely BRIGHTER individuals than me in almost all my classes, so my focus was on LIVING. Enjoying my life and taking the steps necessary to succeed at some stage in the future.

It was around this time that I was exposed to motivational speakers, the first being Dennis Waitley, and I knew what I wanted to do with my life – become a motivational speaker! (For those that are wondering I still am not doing it full time, although I did do it part time time for six years in the 1990’s when my full time work was teaching students to study).

I suppose I have always (for as long as I can remember) had an interest in the psychology of marketing and business and in people in general, but I have always figured that while I have a lot to teach, no one would listen to me, as I have not had that EXPLOSIVE, WOW moment – like winning an Olympic Gold – or the other side of the spectrum, where I am fortunate enough to be ‘average – and not have some weird disorder or medical issue that meant I would instantly be recognized for my physical differences, so once again, why would ANYONE want to pay to hear me talk?

So I grew up, went to university, graduated, was conscripted to the army then started my first full time job at a job in a retail clothing giant, I found that it is sometimes as , if not more important, to know what one DOESN’T want as what one does in life, so I left the security of my low paid job to work for myself. In my 30 odd year career to date I have worked for formal bosses twice for a total of just over 29 months, and have done what is necessary to get by. I have been fortunate to have made money, and as fortunate to have lost money. I learned about life and people – mostly myself – and have done what I thought would make me (and hopefully my family) happy.

In 2015 on a little adventure cycle I had an accident (hit a speed bump that I did not see) and so started my second chance at life, so on the 4th of September every year I celebrate what my friend Louise refers to as my LifeAversary – my second chance at life. I was fortunate to survive my accident – it could very easily have been fatal – and being able to walk (I damaged my spinal cord and have been diagnosed with Central Cord Syndrome), and yet I still felt I had not yet achieved ENOUGH (whatever that means) to go out and tell my story and help others live their best life and find their purpose.

That is until I saw an insignificant advert on Facebook to attend a free 14day program hosted by Gilan Gork. Now I know Gilan, not well but I have met him (more than once) and felt there was no harm in doing what I already do, meditate! I enjoy guided meditations – I listen to Oprah and Deepak as often as I can – and I have the time as after my fall I twice hurt my back so since 2017 I am in traction every day for between 45 and 120 minutes, so I have the time. While listening to Gilan guide the meditation I realized that I have to start some time – I keep telling my children the same thing – that the universe rewards action, not thought – so I have eventually decided to take the plunge and assist the people, the ‘average Joe’ – like ME – to live their best lives – like I have been doing for a while now, as the one ‘strange’ effect I have come away with from my 2015 learning experience (also know as my accident) is that my emotions and my (and I am sure ALL PEOPLE’s) physical body are LINKED.

What does it mean that there is a LINK between one’s BODY and EMOTIONS? Is this the same as the BODY – MIND link? In my opinion, in many ways, YES. If you or anyone is emotional, in a negative way, your body is bound to react differently to how it would if you were emotional in a POSITIVE way.

In my case when I am emotional – either POSITIVELY OR NEGATIVELY – it makes no difference – MY BODY FREEZES UP, starting with my right hand going numb and creeping up my arm – and if I get too emotional – or the emotion continues for an extended period, I cannot walk, my body starts shaking and it takes a LONG time and an LOT – and I mean ALL MY energy, to get back on line.

So, as you can see, I am an average Joe who just happens to be a proud dad (three young men) and I do believe I have something to offer other Average Joe’s who want to live their best lives.

If you find what you have read inspiring and would like to hear more, please let me know and if you have any questions, please ask as this always helps direct my thoughts.